Right now, as you read this story, women in east Auckland are experiencing physical or sexual violence at the hands of their partner.
It’s a crime happening behind closed doors so the victim’s family, friends, and neighbours may have no idea.
Tucked away in an intentionally nondescript house in Pakuranga is a vital organisation, the staff of which work to help and support women who want to leave abusive relationships.
The Eastern Refuge Society is a member of the National Collective of Independent Women’s Refuges.
It provides clients with free and confidential services and has an office and a safe house in east Auckland where they can stay. For that reason, its location is not publicised.
Ana Atkinson, the society’s community engagement lead and privacy officer, says New Zealand has the highest rates of family violence in the OECD.
“One in three women in this country will experience abuse in their lifetime.
“That tells you that unfortunately it’s something that happens everywhere, in all sectors of society regardless of ethnicity, socio-economic level, and education.
“And about 67 per cent of family violence episodes in New Zealand go unreported.
“There’s still a lot of stigma and fear and unfortunately there’s a lot of victim-blaming.
“People say, ‘If it’s that bad why doesn’t she just leave?’. The question should be, ‘Why doesn’t he stop?’.”
The organisation provides a 24-hour crisis phone service and its staff will visit clients if it’s safe to do so.
“We help women wanting to leave an abusive partner, or women who have already left and are being stalked or harassed by their ex-partner, which happens a lot,” Atkinson says.
“We have several teams. One looks after our ladies who are thinking about leaving, or have left and are being stalked or harassed, or are going through the trauma the abusive relationship is having on them.
“We also have a team that looks after ladies staying in the safe house and are in fear for their lives.
“Then we have a team that looks after transitional housing for up to 32 ladies and their children.
“Another team works with the police. After there’s a 111 callout and police attend, usually the next day they’ll go and see the family involved in the incident.
“Most likely with police as very often the perpetrator is still living there.”
The organisation also supports clients to find suitable housing or legal representation.
“Many won’t have the means to pay for lawyers so we help them to get legal aid,” Atkinson says.
“We have programmes for ladies who have protection orders. They’re for women and children and are really good because they help women gain back their self-confidence.
“When they go through violent relationships they lose their sense of value.
“These programmes make them understand that it was not their fault, but also help them identify red flags, those attitudes that men will have, those controlling behaviours.”
Eastern Refuge Society’s 24-hour crisis line is 0800 733 843.
For more information, go online to www.easternrefugesociety.org.nz.
