Join Holly as she searches east Auckland for love and connection.
Reader, you wouldn’t think it to look at me.
To the untrained eye, I’m just another middle-aged suburban woman.
Aren’t love columnists supposed to be starry-eyed 20-somethings, tripping around the city in high heels?
I say no. Whether partnered or single, traditional or progressive, old or young, urban, suburban or rural – love and connection are for everyone.
Hi, I’m Holly. I’m a non-monogamous 40-something woman from Cockle Bay.
My day job consists of helping people feel better connected.
In this column, I’d like to explore love in all its forms.
Did you know, Reader, that the ancient Greeks believed there was not one but eight different kinds of love?
Among them is Ludus – the playful flirty type of love that one might see at the Corner Bar as a new couple enjoys a date.
There’s Storge – the familial love shared by the parents and grandparents who proudly watch little Sam playing netball at Lloyd Elsmore Park.
Then, there’s Eros, the passionate kind of love you might find at my place when The Bulgarian comes to visit.
Another type of love can be found across our fair suburbs – in backyards and book clubs, in churches and pubs.
It’s a type of love that has shaped and made our world. Philia is the love associated with deep friendship.
Together with Agape (empathetic, charitable love), Philia has defined how we build communities, weather tragedies and support each other’s progress.
Yes, Eros may be the driver of procreation, but these two are responsible for civilisation.
Friendship and empathy remind us that the human-race isn’t a race, after all, that sometimes despite all the stress and disagreement in our lives we ought to just slow down and appreciate one another.
It’s my belief that Philia and Agape don’t quite get the play that they deserve these days.
So, Reader, join me as I hunt for them and other forms of love, recording my observations along the way.
Most of all, write to me! Relationships are deeply personal spaces where we can grow, each in our own time and way, so I’m not here to give advice per se.
However, I’d be happy to find and share perspectives to help you enjoy love in all its forms.
Email holly@times.co.nz.
Yours in love, Holly